cement
i went to five different schools
between kindergarten and eighth grade
irmo elementary, seven oaks, harbison west,
irmo middle, and northside junior high
in kindergarten we had pottery class and made snake cups out of clay and then from pottery we would go to recess
our school was terribly overcrowded and at least 40 percent of classrooms were in trailer homes called portables
these portables usually had cement or wooden steps leading about five feet up to the door and the portable itself was laid into a foundation of white concrete
in the south where these schools were a thing called red clay exists
this is not clay from pottery class
this is clay which drives your mother crazy
under a layer of grass
under an inch of topsoil
under a layer of worms
red clays breathes
it is rock hard indelible
and has two stages
super muddy or powdery dust
either way it leaves all your clothes pink
so our school
our overcrowded school
existed in a constant flux of
portable building
red clay mud slides
and cement pouring
this is why
no one was surprised by the big piles of cement rocks or construction materials lying around
no one was surprised by an elementary school
being under constant construction
no one was surprised by all of this so close to the playground
it was the only empty space which seemed to exist
i was left confused at eight years old then
as to why these certain no ones were surprised
when a second grader with second grade rage lifted one of these cement rocks and threw it at a kindergartner
the thump should have been expected
the white rock lying there scarred with blood should have looked natural
the pale unconscious child could have blended into the clay
i was surprised
standing three feet away
that they
they being those who i had trusted to
think of everything
that they had not thought of this first
that they had left it for us to see
that this second grader with terribly dirty hands and thirty years less experience
at thinking up things
had realized what they hadn't
that some kid filled with anger and pain
looking down at a cement block
had been able to outthink the minds of adults
had been able to understand his hands and hatred
and in second grade
to put together
the terrible power
that those two things
in one second
can bring
